Self-proclaimed relationship expert, entrepreneur, author and reality star Tionna Smalls (of the hit reality TV series “What Chilli Wants”) has a brand new book coming to the shelves meant to lead women in the right direction when it comes to dating and relationships these days. Available in stores this week (Friday, January 27th), the new book “Men Love Abuse” is a sequel to the antics she presented in her first relationship book “Girl, Get Your Mind Right” a self-help situational style offering that even her TV co-star Chilli couldn’t get enough of. She obviously didn’t find the man of her dreams, but Tionna still has quite a bit to say about the men females encounter, how to keep them and what they seem to love along the way.
Now when you read the title, like most of us, you might be thinking about the literal sense of it. It’s not about physical abuse according Tionna, but instead it’s a metaphor that exposes what men actually appreciate about a go-getter, head strong woman. Do good girls finish last? Let Tionna tell it like it really is.
On the book title and it’s intended impact:
“It’s a metaphor for not taking no mess. They like the girl that don’t pay them no mind. They like the girl that don’t really care about them a lot. They like the girl that has her own life. That’s what the “abuse” is. I’m not saying smack a dude in the face or punch him out because then you’re going to get beat up. (laughs) You cannot play with men, they are something else.”
On the rules of relationships:
Before you even get in a relationship, the law needs to be set. In the beginning, you make them go hard. You can soften up but you can’t soften up too much. After awhile, the man gets bored and he figures you out already. Men get bored rather quickly and if they figure you out, they’re onto the next chick.
“I always say ‘be a b**** and you get hitched,’ you know? (laughs) Except I use the real word. The main thing is to always work as if you’re dating that person and you have other people that you’re interested in. I said it in my first book “Girl Get Your Mind Right,” you’re never supposed to lose yourself.
On dating multiple men:
You date three men. That doesn’t mean that you’re having sex with all three, but you need to date three men, see how you like it and watch which one makes it to the finish line. The finish line is the person who may propose to you or may really want to marry you. You don’t have to sit there and wait for the relationship with one guy.
On keeping the man at bay:
No title, no chicken. If he isn’t your man, there’s no reason for you to be siting there cooking for him everyday. When you meet a guy, no leaving voicemails. Leaving voicemails is too personal. (laughs) If you want to know what I wanted when I called, you need to call be back. It’s time for is to suck with a purpose. (laughs) Stop getting so hype when you meet one good dude.
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