Jay-Z has once again found himself the focus of an entertainment vet who is getting all Carly Rae Jepsen wondering if Hov will “call them maybe.” Singer Paul Anka told TMZ that Blue Ivy’s dad has not returned his phone calls about performing on his duets album. Just a few months ago Robert De Niro was reported to have gone on a similar rant about Jay-Z not returning his phone calls.
While the rules of social decorum say that at the least “his people should call their people” so that he can politely dodge them, we have 5 good reasons why Mr. Carter hasn’t been able to “rethink possible” when it comes to calling folks back.
5. He Got Hacked.
Cyber terrorists have been doing the most lately and Hova was one of many celebs recently to have their private info compromised. It stands to reason that he’s been preoccupied getting a new drivers license, social security # and Amex Black Card. Not to mention coming up with a new Twitter password. Cut him some slack.
4. He’s busy. Really Busy.
Gentleman, you have to understand that new fathers are incredibly busy. Trying to juggle Presidential Inaugurations, moving the VMAs to The Barclays Center, touring with Justin Timberlake, scoring “The Great Gatsby” and keeping up with Blue Ivy’s evident growth spurts means that you may be waiting a little longer than usual for a call back.
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3. The Nets are In the Playoffs
It’s been six years since the Nets have been able to officially compete for an NBA championship and the first time as the newly minted Brooklyn Nets, so you have to understand that as a Brooklyn Native Hov is a little distracted right now. Plus he’s been riding the subway to the Barclays and there is no reception down there. He’ll be calling as soon as they get knocked out in the first round. We promise.
2. Ducking Kanye
Don’t take it personally Mr. Anka but Hov isn’t answering anybody’s calls right now because he’s hiding from Kanye. Yeezy has been lashing out publicly, under a lot of pressure to pick a baby name that is both SEO Friendly yet obscure enough to be Trademarked. Jigga Man just wants to do rap cameos and watch his daughter blow bubbles in peace.
1. Those Duracell Powermats are basura!
If you were at the Made in America festival like us and stood in line at those charging tents when your phone died, or bought one of those awful external batteries, you know the power struggle well. So if Hov is indeed relying on these things to stay connected he has a really good excuse for not returning phone calls. It’s probably not on for very long.
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